Indwelling

 

"... time isn't a straight line along which we travel, 

but a deep dot in which we dwell." ~Sue Monk Kidd

Living deeply in one place has not been something I've been able to do... well. I have had more of a "horizontal existence" reaching out to places and people and things unknown to me. New experiences provided a rush of adrenaline that had me making those leaps quite consistently. Pair that with being a 7 on the Enneagram [more about that another time] and FOMO [fear of missing out]; it was quite a shallow life. I equated these experiences with growth outside my comfort zone not realizing that it WAS my comfort zone - avoidance!

I was stone hopping experiences as Jumpin' Julia! I was avoiding the deep depths of pain that moving on left behind. Subsequently it didn't allow me to be my most compassionate self with anyone.  "Look at the bright side." "Find the silver lining." "What's the gift in this?" All dishonor and dismiss a whole other set of feelings and experiences and messages. Living only half a life; partially dipping my toe in the ocean of living only to realize that full submersion is true (w)holiness. And while I was "growing" externally through new places and people and events - my interior remained unchanged.  

These days I'm being invited into something different, deeper. My whole life I've questioned my purpose in the world. What am I truly passionate about? Where are the places that I lose myself & find some zen? How do I serve during this one short and precious life? And the interesting thing about the answer is that it is the "path" unfolding within me right where I am living! WHAT?!?? Without overthinking it and for simplicity's sake - this is EXACTLY my life.  The one I am living. 

True depth means living below your thinking for you are not your thoughts.  True depth means living below your emotions because like the water they ebb & flow. You are not your feelings. True depth means living from your core, the center of what makes you unique.  The place that whispers your deepest desires and your wildest dreams. True depth is courage to live in spite of your fears.  True depth is knowing that all of this is a mirror that works on your behalf to unveil & reveal your true Self!

When we live authentically as the Archeologist of our Inner World we uncover undiscovered places within us. When we allow ourselves to lean into our (w)holiness we don't deny unsavory parts of who we are. When we dwell fully and deeply at our core we manifest our Purpose in this world.