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Showing posts from March, 2020

Journal 03.26.2020

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May we find PEACE May we BE calm May we know WE ARE ONE! Every day I am dancing with my balance between fear and FAITH. One day fear leads in all its anxiety and worry and stress. Then, FAITH show up in ALL her glory and brings HOPE and TRUST and LOVE!  Today I am calm. We are in a liminal time - a threshold between what we once knew and what will become as we travel through this unknown space.  We've all had transitions in our personal lives. This one is amplified because it's happening on a macro-level, all-of-us, together! All of us, TOGETHER! All of us, TOGETHER! All of us, TOGETHER! What if, it is simply this simple; we are a part of a larger collective organism where what we do affects another. No borders, no boundaries of race or country, no political boxes, etc. One collective body of humans, interrelated, interdependent, interconnected, breathing in (and breathing out) this LIFE TOGETHER. What thoughts can you find peace in? Where in your bod

Journal 03.21.2020

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"Love the world as your own self; then you can truly care for all things." ~LaoTzu BREATHE. faith not  fear.  find PEACE BE Calm know WE ARE ONE! Yesterday I was surprisingly calm. I didn't need any diazepam.  I went to the grocery store for my mom and felt really good about that! The day continued quietly; laundry, a book, shared time with my mom on the porch... OH! And the sky this morning was AMAZING! Sooo clear, the stars sooo bright. We're waning into a new MOON so no sign of that sliver until later this morning. The Earth is healing! Nature herself is resilient! Sooo many stresses that we've placed on this planet due to population and growth and abuse of resources - HALTED - if only for a brief moment. Mother Earth can BREATHE again. Have you noticed the signs of Spring? The birds singing. The snow melting. The grass greening. ... and She continues ... and so will we, hopefully in a different way -  slower, more purposeful

Journal 03.17.2020

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Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me.  ~Psalm 23:4 Does one document a pandemic? ...for posterity? ...for reflection? ...for obsessing? I. DON'T. KNOW.  But I do know that I'm on my 1st Diazepam for the day and the 3rd pill in 2 days.  My writing is shaky.  My body overrun with anxiety and psychosomatic thoughts that I have Coronavirus ~ even with my hermit lifestyle. It could be! Part of me would prefer to get it and just go through it. Experience it and (hopefully) realize it's not too bad and SURVIVE! But does death scare me? Yes... and NO.  It is inevitable and unavoidable.  We are part of nature and ALL of nature is born & dies as it's own repeating pattern.  Honestly, I think death makes me sad to leave the ones I love behind. I know some day it will happen, just not now.  I can weather A LOT! And I'm not ready to leave... even though grandma gray, greg, and meghan await in the

the Wilderness WITHIN!

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"Who looks inside, awakes."  ~ Carl Jung In this human experience we dance between "nowhere" and "now here". The unique expression of who we are includes both our vulnerabilities and our (w)holiness.  The awareness is that we participate in it ALL. That in its simplest form when we're not reaching for tomorrow or reliving the past; we. are. present to what IS showing up in our lives. When we are not judging between one extreme or the other we can allow radical acceptance versus expectation and simply embody what shows up moment to moment.  I am certain that we can all find examples where we have embraced our (w)holiness and pushed away our vulnerability. What makes one different than the other? It could be circumstance. It could be our current emotional state. It could be our own opinion & judgement around the situation. We think one is a weakness and the other a show of our strength; when with awareness we realize we ebb and flow betwee